Put Down The Crisco, Jabba!

The Center for Science in Public Interest wants you to know that it’s okay that you’re too stupid to make nutrition choices on your own, either for yourself or your children.     

That’s why the CSPI is threatening to sue McDonald’s, the world’s most popular purveyor of food-flavored edible products, unless the fast-food giant stops including toys with its popular Happy Meals.     

Not Only Did McDonald's Make Him An Evil Mutant, But It May Also Have Contributed To His Little Weight Problem.

“McDonald’s is the stranger in the playground handing out candy to children,” CSPI’s litigation director, Stephen Gardner, said in a prepared statement. “It’s a creepy and predatory practice that warrants an injunction.”     

Countered a McDonald’s representative:     

“The toy is plastic, retard.  Zero calories.    

Y’know, if we really gave a fuck about the nation’s creme-filled arteries, we’d leave out the food.”     

It boils down to this:  You’re a syphilitic monkey too stupid to refuse poison if it’s presented to you in a nice bottle with a shiny bow.      

Don’t bother thinking about it.  Why don’t you watch some TV?  I think Two and a Half Men is on . . .     

I’ll Just Take My Fat Ass Somewhere Else: McDonald’s faces lawsuit over marketing to kids – Jun. 22, 2010.     


Share With Facebook And I’ll Take You To Krispy Kreme

This entry was posted in Constitutional Issues, Culture, Duh, Food, General Foolishness, Health, National Events, People, Political Correctness and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Put Down The Crisco, Jabba!

  1. thinksquad says:

    What would we do if we didn’t have someone telling us what is right or wrong?

  2. Smaktakula says:

    That’s the thing: I don’t even know any more.

  3. The Hook says:

    Fantastic job! Poor Blob… no respect – ever!

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