By Smaktakula
Whatever happened to Carl Bernstein?
“I Told ‘Em A Million Times, It Shoulda Been ‘Bernstein & Woodward’ On That Byline. It’s Alphabetical, I Said. Plus, It Just Sounds Better.”
Woodward Was Always The Cooler Of The Two.
Recent Comments
Since you have a picture of Tom Cruise on here today…I saw a tabloid that said him and Katie broke up…then end of the TomKat…I’m not sure what the worlds coming to.
Right? When a runty, closeted, religious zealot can’t find true love, what hope is there for the rest of us?
I believe he’s a rabbi now. And a game show host.
As God is my witness, Carrie, I have no idea whether or not you’re being facetious. No, don’t tell me. Normally, I’d look this up to confirm or deny, but you know what?…nope. That’s just too beautiful a thing to try to squeeze into the whole “factual/non-factual” thing.
When I can post a comment of complete fiction and have it appear truthful, then I know I have made it. Fait accompli.
Well, good for you–but you realize that even a quick reading of your statement gives the definitive answer I most definitely did not want.
Yes, I did believe you–and I would have been happy–more than happy, even–to go on believing you.
Unless it IS real, and you’re tricking me. But no, no. I was foolish to get my hopes up like that.
Sorry to burst your bubble, but I would hate to be responsible for your spreading false information. PT would never do that…
You joke, but (and here I’m being serious–really) I really do try to only promulgate false information that I know to be untrue. I would’ve verified it eventually, but I just wanted to continue to believe for a little while.
It really was the perfect lie, because it was sufficiently ridiculous to be interesting, but not so overblown (“I hear he’s got his own dildo empire!”) that it wasn’t at least within the realm of possibility.
And I guess you had my best interests at heart in not wanting me to (unknowingly) promulgate false information. Someday I’ll tell the cautionary tale that illustrates that very virtue, “The Three-Humped Camel.” Despite the delicious possibilities implicit in that title, it’s not at all dirty.
Not at all dirty? Well, that’s a disappointment then…
Seriously–the closest approximation to the way I feel right now is a kid who wakes up on Christmas morning to find he’s a Jehovah’s Witness.
Bummer. But better than finding out you’re a scientologist…
Right now, I’m not so sure. Scientologists believe lots of nutty things in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary; maybe I could use a little of that credulity to cling to Let’s Make A Deal with Rabbi Bernstein.
Brava, Carrie. You almost had me at that one too.
I feel bad for Bernstein—he was probably always stuck being Woodward’s wingman.
Fer sure–but I see him as being a terrible wing-man. A lot of passive-aggressive cock-blocking. That’s what HER friends are for!
Eh. After he left Nora Ephron, he was dead to me.
And now she’s dead too.
WATCH YOUR BACK, WOODWARD!
I hadn’t seen the connection before, but you’re right–it’s so obvious!
Nixon’s dead too, isn’t he. Yeah, that’s what I thought.
And thanks for the typo fix!
And Deep Throat. Chuck Colson. Even Ben Bradlee. The body count is piling up.
No worries!