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Category Archives: Drugs
Some Portion Of Charlie Sheen’s Brain Miraculously Unravaged By Syphilis
Despicable wife-beater and inebriate Charlie Sheen has wisely chosen to stick with his awful show. Promethean Times applauds Mr. Sheen’s decision to follow our advice. Furthermore, we would like to remind readers that it couldn’t have been easy for the once-promising actor to accept the grim … Continue reading
Posted in Drug Culture, Drugs, General Foolishness, Hollywood, People, Relationships, Satire, Television
Tagged career limbo, Charlie Estevez, Charlie Sheen, Charlie Sheen is a drugged-out wifebeater, Charlie Sheen Will Never Escape The Brat Pack's Terrible Event Horizon, drunkard, Emilio's wasted brother, Hot Shots!, lout, Post-Haim Era, sot, syphilis, The French Disease, Two and a Half Men, vast wasteland, wastrel, wind-up monkey
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‘Choking Game’ Claims Victim; Promethean Times Urges Panic
By Smaktakula The hidden scourge of America’s youth has claimed another victim. Erik Robinson died on April 20th after playing the ‘Choking Game.’ The rules of the game are sketchy, but it can be assumed that Robinson lost. A ghastly situation like this … Continue reading
Charlie Sheen Believes Hookers And Booze Fall Magically From The Sky
Well, they don’t, Charlie! Someone has to pay for them. Continue reading
Posted in Drugs, General Foolishness, Hollywood, People, Television
Tagged booze, Charlie Sheen, Charlie Sheen is a drugged-out wifebeater, debauchery, douchebaggery, drugs, hookers, misplaced artistic integrity, rehab, Richard Simmons, Sheen leaving, spousal abuse, three-time loser, Two and a Half Men, untalented stars
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Marijuana Legalization Will Transform Humboldt Into Appalachia
By Smaktakula In the debate over California’s upcoming ballot measure to legalize marijuana, Promethean Times has heretofore resisted editorializing so that the electorate might arrive at its own decision in November. However, the discourse has done little to educate voters, and instead has achieved … Continue reading
Posted in Constitutional Issues, Crime, Culture, Drug Culture, Drugs, National Events, Plantlife, Politics, Regional Politics
Tagged ballot measure, California, California marijuana initiative, cannabis, cannabis cowboys, dope, drug legalization, ganja, grass, hemp, Humboldt County, illicit shadow industry, legalize it, marijuana, marijuana legalization, outlaw growers, pot, reefer, sweet sweet cheeba, weed, Zig-Zags, Ziploc
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The Legalization Question
Should we legalize it? Continue reading
Posted in Constitutional Issues, Culture, Drug Culture, Drugs, Health, National Events, National Politics, Plantlife, Politics
Tagged ballot box, California, California marijuana initiative, cannabis, doobage, dope, drug legalization, ganja, grass, hemp, legalize it, marijuana, marijuana legalization, pot, reefer, sweet sweet cheeba, the initiative, Tommy Chong, weed
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Ron Washington Makes Requisite Cocaine Apology
The Age of the Enforced Apology continues. Texas Rangers Manager Ron Washington apologized for testing positive for cocaine last summer. Our celebrity-obsessed society dictates that what would be an embarrassing episode for a private citizen, must become an excercise in self-flagellation … Continue reading
Posted in Baseball, Culture, Drug Culture, Drugs, General Foolishness, Health, People, Political Correctness, Scandal, Sports
Tagged A-Rod, Alex Rodgriguez, anabolic steroids, cocaine, George W. Bush, hypocrisy, Jose Canseco, Ken Caminiti, MLB, Ron Washington, Texas Rangers
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Walmart Likes To Kick ‘Em When They’re Down
Just when you think Wal-Mart couldn’t sink any lower . . . Continue reading
Posted in Corporate Culture, Drugs, General Foolishness, Health, Justice
Tagged brain cancer, corporate douchebaggery, corporate policy, cruel, dope, douchebaggery, ganja, heartless, inoperable cancer, Joseph Casias, marijuana, medical marijuana, pot, reefer, sinus cancer, sweet sweet cheeba, Wal-Mart, Wal-Mart is evil, Wal-Mart sucks, weed
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Reuters Wants You To Know That U.S. Children Turn To Inhaling To Get High
Is your child huffing right now? Continue reading
Posted in Crime, Drug Culture, Drugs, Duh, General Foolishness, Health, National Events
Tagged aerosols, choking game, fainting game, genie, getting high, household products, huffing, inhalants, Jenkem, K2, media scare, Reuters, Rocket Ride, sensationalist media, sniffing, solvent, Spice, urban legends, vapors
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Lindsay Lohan Needs $$$
By Smaktakula Because cocaine isn’t cheap. Lindsay Lohan, Flower of American Skankhood and tabloid headline regular, claims she’s been dishonored by a recent E-Trade commercial. Team Lohan maintains that E-Trade used her “likeness, name, characterization and personality” without permission. The offending commercial: … Continue reading
