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Category Archives: History
Revealed: Why John Adams Became President
By Smaktakula 1) He couldn’t play guitar. 2) Unlike his cousin Sam, a successful brewer to this day, he had no marketable skills. 3) His career as a psychic proved a bust when he made well-publicized but shitty predictions like this … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, General Foolishness, History, Holiday, Humor, Mythology, National Events, National Politics, People, Politics, Relationships, Satire
Tagged guitar, Independence Day, John Adams, July 2nd, July 4th, lame presidents, marketable skills, President Adams, Samuel Adams, shitty psychics, Thomas Jefferson
11 Comments
This Day In History: July 2, 1776 CE
On which the Founding Fathers tell the tyrant King George III what he can do with his onerous taxes and hated Redcoats.
Posted in Culture, History, Holiday, Mythology, National Events, People, Relationships, Social Networking
Tagged 1776, all men are created equal, Declaration of Independence, Founding Fathers, Great Britain, Independence Day, John Hancock, July 2nd, July 4th, King George III, liberty, Liberty Hall, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Redcoats, taxation without representation, this day in history, Thomas Jefferson, United States of America
8 Comments
Tardsie’s True-Ass Tales: No English
By Tardsie One of the most unnerving experiences I can recall, but which actually turned out to be a whole lot of nothing, occurred in the middle of the night on a train bound for Memphis from Chicago. I travelled … Continue reading
Remember America’s Fallen By Making A Purchase
By Smaktakula It has become easy to think of Memorial Day as simply a time to squeeze in that last vacation before summer comes to an abrupt and aching end, an excuse to drive somewhere and there to cook a piece of meat, … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, General Foolishness, History, Holiday, Mythology, National Events, North America
Tagged $$$, America's fallen, Blame Arturo!, capitalism, end of summer, Labor Day, Mammon, Memorial Day, merchandise, sacrifice, shining city on a hill, some gave all, stars & stripes, summer sales, the terrorists win, true meanings of holidays, United States of America
2 Comments
Meet Tomorrow’s Tyrants Today: Even Littler Kim
By Smaktakula The question of succession in North Korea weighs heavily on heads of state across the globe. This is particularly true for neighbors of the belligerent Asian nation, who fear the possible future of a North Korea even more despotic and mercurial than the current … Continue reading
Posted in Asia, Culture, History, Military, Mythology, Politics, World Affairs
Tagged 'Lil 'Lil Kim, Brilliant Comrade, California, comical despots, fun with stereotypes, impoverished third-world hellhole, Kim Curly-jo, Kim Jong-il, Kim Jong-un, Kim Jong-un is batshit crazy, Kim Larry-il, meet tomorrow's tyrants today, Nintendo, North Korea, Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!, third generation tyrants
4 Comments
Jimmy Carter Makes Modest Headway In Ongoing Bid For Historical Relevance
By Smaktakula Historical footnote Jimmy Carter has managed to secure the release of Aijalon Gomes from North Korea. Gomes had been sentenced to eight years hard labor under the autocratic regime of the dying, but still comically despotic Kim Jong-il. … Continue reading
Posted in Asia, Crime, History, International Relations, Justice, National Events, People, Politics, Relationships, World Affairs
Tagged Aijalon Gomes, Bill Clinton, Bill vs. Jimmy, comical despots, do-gooders, Euna Lee, Habitat For Humanity, historical footnote, historical footnotes, hostages freed, I just called 'em both 'LingLee.', ineffectual presidents, Jimmy Carter, Kim Jong-il, Laura Ling, North Korea, one-termers, President Carter, President Clinton, skonks, Slick Willy
8 Comments
Helpful Hints For Everyday Life: Family Matters
By Smaktakula If you ever find yourself forced to make small talk with wacky cult leader and would-be-Messiah Charles Manson, it’s probably best not to mention the Beatles unless you’ve got the time to hang out for a while.
Posted in Crime, Culture, Drug Culture, General Foolishness, History, Justice, Music, Mythology, National Events, People, Relationships, Social Networking
Tagged Bring Charlie a sandwich!, Charles Manson, Charlie Manson, Charlie Manson is batshit crazy, crazy fucker, cult leaders, cultists, demagoguery, helpful hints, Helter Skelter, Manson Family, murderers, piggies, the "White Album", the Beatles, would-be-Messiahs
1 Comment
Mongolian Nazis? We Get It. Wait . . . No, We Don’t.
By Smaktakula For fans of historical reenaction and other loveless shut-ins who spend their days pondering what would happen if Adolf Hitler and Genghis Khan united in an anachronistic super-villain team up, this is as close as you’re likely to get. Give Them Points For Effort At … Continue reading
Posted in Asia, Culture, General Foolishness, History, Mythology, Race, Relationships, Social Networking, World Affairs
Tagged Adolf Hitler, anachronistic historical team-ups, bigotry, China, fascism, fucking idiots, Fuhrer, Genghis Khan, Holocaust, jackassery, Mongolia, Mongolian Nazis, Nazis, pure evil, racial pride, racial seperatism, racism, Super-Villain Team Up, totalitarianism, what the hell does 'Sieg Hire' mean anyway?, WTF?
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