Tag Archives: Crystal Harris

Hugh Hefner: Why Is Grandpa Crying?

Posted on June 20, 2011 by Smaktakula

By Smaktakula Cartoonish anachronism Hugh Hefner is no doubt devastated after being left at the altar. His former fiance, the twenty-five-year-old strumpet Crystal Harris, seems to have come to her senses at the last minute, announcing Tuesday that she would … Continue reading →

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Posted in Celebrity, Culture, News, Stupidity | Tagged creepy old perverts, Crystal Harris, D-Listers, Dracula, elder abuse, floozies, gold digger, Greta Van Susteren, Hugh Hefner, human souls, jilted, left at the alter, May-December romances, old people, Pandora's Box, Playboy, Playboy Mansion, porn empire, pornography, Ryan Reynolds, strumpets, that old person smell, that trick never works, the best laid plans of mice and men, Viagra | Leave a comment

Hefner’s Antics Now More Creepy Than Cute

Posted on December 30, 2010 by Smaktakula

By Smaktakula Hugh Hefner, the decrepit, Viagra-gobbling relic of the Sexual Revolution, recently proposed to Crystal Harris, Playboy‘s Miss December 2009. Hefner, old enough to remember the Great Depression, announced his engagement to the twenty-four-year-old Harris via a Christmas Eve tweet. … Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrity, Culture, News | Tagged 1989 Playmate of the Year, 70's era machismo, Barbi Benton, Benny Hill, Christie Hefner, creepy, creepy old perverts, Crystal Harris, cultural relics, debauchery, dirty old man, Donna Michelle, elderly people, gold digger, Hef, Hugh Hefner, incontinence, Kimberly Conrad, May-December romances, Men in Belted Sweaters, Miss December 2009, old people, Peter Pan Syndrome, Playboy, Playmate of the Month, puritanism, senility, senior citizens, sex among the aged, Sexual Revolution, Shady Acres, Shannon Tweed, the viscosity of macho, tiresome anachronism, Twitter, Viagra | 2 Comments

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Tag Archives: Crystal Harris

Hugh Hefner: Why Is Grandpa Crying?

Hefner’s Antics Now More Creepy Than Cute

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