Tag Archives: Kate Middleton

Prince William: Who Will Be His Camilla Parker-Bowles?

Posted on May 31, 2012 by Smaktakula

This piece originally ran on 11.19.10 By Smaktakula The hearts of aging Anglophiles and reclusive shut-ins worldwide are aglow with the happy news of Prince William’s engagement to his long-time girlfriend, the lovely Kate Middleton. Kate and William, the future … Continue reading →

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Posted in Celebrity, News | Tagged 'Lil 'Lil Kim, Andrew Parker-Bowles, Britain's Royal Family, Camilla Parker Bowles, Charles Barkley, childish sexual innuendo, Diana Spencer, Duchess of Cornwall, England, fanny means something altogether different to the British, forbidden love, Great Britain, impoverished third-world hellhole, Kate Middleton, Kim Jong-un, Lady Di, Monica Lewinsky, North Korea, Prince Charles, Prince Harry, Prince William, Queen Elizabeth II, Queen Victoria, Royal weddings, Royals, Sir Charles, United Kingdom, we're not making the Tampax thing up--he said it | 7 Comments

Promethean Times’ 2011 Person Of The Year: Us Again

Posted on December 30, 2011 by Smaktakula

By The Promethean Times Editorial Staff We’ll admit it–we didn’t think it would come to this. We figured we’d be rich by now, or at the very least the Rapture would have freed us from our myriad woes. Since it … Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrity, Crime, Culture, Entertainment, History, News, Politics, Religion | Tagged 'Lil Kim, 1492, 2010, 2011, 2012, Afghanistan, Amy Winehouse, Arab Spring, Armenian Genocide, Arnold Schwarzenegger, arson, Barack Obama, California, Celebrity Death Watch, Charlie Sheen, Cleveland, Code Pink, Democratic Republic of Congo, Democrats, Diana Spencer, Dirk Nowitzki, dumb kids and the dumb things they do to fuck up their lives, ennui, Fidel Castro, Flower of American Skankhood, Gabby Giffords, gay people, Jani Lane, John Boehner, Julius Malema, Kate Middleton, Kim Jong-il, Kim Jong-un, Kim Kardashian, LeBron James, Leslie Nielsen, Lewis County, Libya, LiLo, Lindsay Lohan, Mayans, Muammar al-Gaddafi, muslims, Nancy Pelosi, narcos, North Korea, Oakland, Occupy, Osama bin Laden, places that suck, Prince William, prognostication, Promethean Times' Person of the Year, puppy-killing, Randy 'Macho Man' Savage, Rapture, Republicans, Robert Mugabe, San Francisco, self-promotion so shameless that it borders on hucksterism, Smaktakula is aware that 'penises' is the accepted plural but if it's good enough for Steinbeck it's good enough for us, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Smaktakula's vendetta against Lewis County, South Africa, Steve Jobs, Tea Party, the cult-like devotion accorded to Steve Jobs by effete Mac users, the French, the West, United States of America, Washington State, Zimbabwe | Leave a comment

Royals: Keeping It In The Family

Posted on May 3, 2011 by Smaktakula

By Smaktakula Most people know that in days of yore European royalty was a tight-knit club. So tight-knit, in fact, that intermarriages among the various royal families increasingly began to produce malignant progeny who were deformities, idiots and stillbirths. History … Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrity, Culture, History | Tagged Alexei Nikolaevich, Beatrice of York, blue-bloods, Britain's Royal Family, Buckingham Palace, childish sexual innuendo, congenital afflictions, European Royalty, France, Great Britain, hemophilia, HURRR!, incest, Kate Middleton, King Ralph, Louis XIV, Nicholas II, Prince Andrew, Prince William, Princess Beatrice, Royal Disease, Royal weddings, Royals, royaltard, Sarah Ferguson, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, spokescow, United Kingdom, Weight Watchers | 2 Comments

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Tag Archives: Kate Middleton

Prince William: Who Will Be His Camilla Parker-Bowles?

Promethean Times’ 2011 Person Of The Year: Us Again

Royals: Keeping It In The Family

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