Tag Archives: North Korea

Headlines: We’re Not Laughing, Ricky

By Smaktakula In which we celebrate ignorance by responding to the headlines of news articles we have not bothered to read. *** What We Lost When J.F.K. Died ~ Our reluctance to embrace wacky conspiracy theories. Rain Forest Plants Race to Outrun … Continue reading

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Posted in Celebrity, Crime, Culture, Headlines, History, News, Philosophy, Politics, Religion, Stupidity | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Headlines: Get On Your Knees And Fight Like A Man

By Smaktakula You can read the articles if you want. We didn’t. We’re just talking about the headlines. *** 11 Social Security Mistakes People Make ~ The biggest one is assuming it will meet your post-retirement financial needs. That’s not a joke. … Continue reading

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Headlines: Achtung, Maybe!

By Smaktakula In which we champion the twin virtues of indolence and illiteracy by commenting on the day’s headlines without knowing a thing about them. *** Help! I Caught My Landlord in a Compromising Position With His Dog. ~ And now I … Continue reading

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Headlines 11.02.12

By Smaktakula In which we showcase our unparalleled knack for expounding authoritatively upon a broad range of topics about which we remain not only ignorant, but deliberately so. We lose interest after the headlines. *** Deaf dolphin rescued in La. will get … Continue reading

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Headlines: Great Big Boobs & A Phyllis Diller Smile

By Smaktakula *** In which we indulge both our love of talking out of our asses and our shameful laziness by commenting on the headlines while leaving the actual reading to you. *** Why Romney is so unpopular with black voters ~ Besides running … Continue reading

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Let’s Try Hating Someone New

By Smaktakula Humanity is no stranger to hate. Throughout its long and bloody history, Homo sapiens has always managed to find a worthwhile reason not just to oppose another group’s political and social agenda, but to despise and fear the individuals who … Continue reading

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Prince William: Who Will Be His Camilla Parker-Bowles?

This piece originally ran on 11.19.10 By Smaktakula The hearts of aging Anglophiles and reclusive shut-ins worldwide are aglow with the happy news of Prince William’s engagement to his long-time girlfriend, the lovely Kate Middleton. Kate and William, the future … Continue reading

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Return Of Not What You Were Looking For?

By Tardsie Not everyone who visits Promethean Times finds us on purpose. Here we respond to some of the bizarre, dangerous and downright foul search terms by which you found us. Enjoy! *** fags love straight men ~ It’s true, but … Continue reading

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Promethean Times’ 2011 Person Of The Year: Us Again

By The Promethean Times Editorial Staff We’ll admit it–we didn’t think it would come to this.  We figured we’d be rich by now, or at the very least the Rapture would have freed us from our myriad woes.  Since it … Continue reading

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North Korea Fires On Santa’s Sleigh

By Smaktakula In a move considered dickish even by the attenuated standards of blighted pariah nations, rogue state North Korea fired two Nodong-2 missles at Santa’s Sleigh early Sunday morning, narrowly missing the beloved quasi-diety.  Santa and his reindeer are … Continue reading

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