Tag Archives: Promethean Times

Get To Know Promethean Times

Posted on August 31, 2011 by Smaktakula

Some things you should probably know before reading Promethean Times: * We take ourselves every bit as seriously as you do. If it’s not funny, that means you didn’t get it. Readers who miss the point are invited–encouraged even–to comment … Continue reading →

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Posted in News | Tagged Arturo the Pool Boy, Cameroon, discrimination, equal opportunity offender, integrity, Jack T. Chick, John Edwards, misanthropy, missing the point, Promethean Times, reacharound, self-promotion so shameless that it borders on hucksterism, short people, Smaktakula's distrust of short people, Tardsie The Backpack, Why am I so stupid? | Leave a comment

Smaktakula Is Super-Freaking Rich

Posted on June 13, 2011 by tardsie

By Tardsie Smaktakula announced at a press conference today that he is “Super-freaking rich” and that he is now “finally living the life I deserve.” He punctuated this with, “Who’s laughing now, bitches?”, which he followed up with “Nobody, that’s … Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrity, Stupidity | Tagged Africa, African strongmen, Chad, Croesus, delusion, gazillionaires, greed, ignorance, Lottery tickets, Nigeria, Nigerian email scam, pimp-cup, playing the lottery as an investment, poor math skills, Promethean Times, Scrooge McDuck, self-deception, Smaktakula, We trust Wikipedia as far as we can throw it, wealth, Wikipedia | 2 Comments

Free Tibet! (Or Did That Already Happen?)

Posted on January 6, 2011 by Smaktakula

By Smaktakula It’s a challenge to drive any distance these days without seeing the ubiquitous political bumper sticker, in which complex and deeply-nuanced issues are boiled down to a sloganized reduction so bereft of substance that it makes the average … Continue reading →

Posted in Culture, History | Tagged abortion, adhesive decal, Americans' woeful lack of a global perspective, Asia, ass-talking, Barack Obama, bumper sticker mentality, China, Dalai Lama, Did we ever fix the Rain Forest?, Free Tibet flags, Free Tibet!, Free World, freeway pundits, Fugeeman, Haiti, Haitians don't play baseball, irony, irony sense, Ivory Coast, jackassery, John Edwards, John Kerry, KERRY/EDWARDS 2004, Macedonia, mythical creatures, mythical lands, Native Americans, Norway, OBAMA IS A SOCIALIST!, people who want to sound smart but aren't, PISS, political bumper stickers, Political Intelligence Standards Survey, political philosophy, political slogans, post-Soviet, Promethean Times, Smaktakula's ability to shamelessly talk out of his ass, SMILE YOU WEREN'T ABORTED, South America, Soviet Union, Sri Lanka, stupid people, stupidity on display, sub-Saharan, Tibet, Tibetans, uninformed opinions, voodoo, we choose to use 'stupid' as a noun. What are you gonna do?, we don't know what we're talking about, Wendigo, William Faulkner, Wyclef Jean, Yeti | Leave a comment

Promethean Times’ 2010 Person Of The Year: Us

Posted on December 31, 2010 by tardsie

By Promethean Times Conventional wisdom warns that TIME‘s annual Person of the Year award is so iconic as to render superfluous any imitations. However, as it has so many times before, Promethean Times eschews the expected by boldly forging a … Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrity, Cinema, Crime, Culture, History, News, Politics, Religion, Sport | Tagged 'Lil Kim, 2010, 2011, Abner Doubleday should sue the hell out of the guy who 'invented' cricket, Africa, American soldiers, Axis of Evil, Barack Obama, bellicose shenanigans, Bernie Madoff, BP, Bradley Manning, Bush the intellectuable, Chief Executive, comical despots, Conan O'Brien, congress, conventional wisdom, copyright infringement, corporate douchebaggery, cricket, Democratic Party, effete Mac users, Elizabeth Edwards, Face & Boobs man, feel-good policies, figurative fellatio, Franklin Pierce, Fugeeman, games foreigners play, genocide, George W. Bush, GOP, Haiti, Haitian Crisis, Haitian Earthquake, Hitler of Major League Baseball, How very original!, hucksterism, impoverished third-world hellhole, Iran, Jay Leno, John Edwards, Julian Assange, Kim Jong-il is batshit crazy, leeches, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is batshit crazy, Martha Stewart Living, Michael Lohan, MiLo, Miss You Mom, modern classics, Mood the Dude, mullets, Nanci Pelosi, nanny state, North Korea, Osama bin Laden, Osama's crazed legions, Pat Robertson, Pat Robertson is batshit crazy, People Magazine, personal magnetism, Pierce was known more for drink than for effective leadership, poor Elizabeth Edwards--she was so brave and she suffered so much, popular culture, President Bush, President Obama, Promethean Times, Promethean Times' Person of the Year, religious right, Republican Party, retcons, rumor has it that the vote for Person of the Year was fixed, San Francisco Giants, San Mateo, Sarah Palin, Smaktakula's hatred of the San Francisco Giants, special-needs children, Spiro Agnew, Sports Illustrated, step your game up, Steve Jobs, Tea Party, terrifying Campfire Girl, Texas Rangers, the canonization of St. Elizabeth, the cult-like devotion accorded to Steve Jobs by effete Mac users, the Devil, the impotence of the UN, the increasing irrelevance of TIME, the UN's maddening inaction in the face of genocide, theogeologist, Tim Lincecum, Time, TIME allows pedestrian intellects to believe they are otherwise, TIME's Person of the Year, Tony Hayward, tradition, Transformers I and II, treachery, UN, United Nations, United States of America, WikiLeaks, Wyclef Jean, yes theogeologist is another coinage but like grammaverick you've gotta admit it kicks ass | Leave a comment

Everything Suddenly Coming Up Promethean Times

Posted on August 2, 2010 by Smaktakula

A Very Special Message From Smaktakula Much like human papillomavirus in America’s high schools, Promethean Times is pretty hard to avoid these days. Find Promethean Times At WWW.PROMETHEANTIMES.COM For our elderly or intellectually disinclined readers: Don’t get excited; the old address will still take you … Continue reading →

Posted in Cinema, Culture, Duh, General Foolishness, Hollywood, Music, National Events, People, Relationships, Television | Tagged Carmen Electra, cataclysmically-retarded, Dave Navarro, elderly people, Facebook, Facebook friends won't pick you up at the airport, has-been, human papillomavirus, HURRR!, intellectually disinclined, it means genital warts, Ms. Electra is probably a very nice young lady, Promethean Times, self-promotion so shameless that it borders on hucksterism, senior citizens, stupid people, stupidity, Twitter, untalented stars, you most likely have papilloma sorry to say | Leave a comment

Promethean Times Gets Gussied Up

Posted on May 13, 2010 by Smaktakula

We’re on Facebook now! Be sure to take some time off from your busy schedule of Farmville/Mafia Wars to check us out.

Posted in Culture, General Foolishness, Relationships, Social Networking | Tagged Facebook, Farmville, hockey mom, lipstick on a pig, Mafia Wars, Promethean Times, time wasting activities | 2 Comments

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Tag Archives: Promethean Times

Get To Know Promethean Times

Smaktakula Is Super-Freaking Rich

Free Tibet! (Or Did That Already Happen?)

Promethean Times’ 2010 Person Of The Year: Us

Everything Suddenly Coming Up Promethean Times

LIKE Promethean Times on Facebook!

Subscribe to Promethean Times!

The Best Of Times

Dumb Stuff We Say On Twitter:

Recent Times

WORD.

Promethean History

Search The Prometheosphere

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Smaktakula

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