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Tag Archives: San Francisco
Best of Headlines II
By Smaktakula In which we present Part II of the Lost Headlines. Look, if you want to waste your time reading the articles, more power to you. As for us, the headlines tell us all we really need to know. … Continue reading
Posted in Crime, Culture, History, News
Tagged anti-semitism, childish sexual innuendo, cockfighting, dolphins, dyslexia, Germany, Holocaust deniers, Iran, Nadya Suleman, Octomom, rape, San Francisco, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Strait of Hormuz, the French, the French people's love of stinky things, the Greatest Generation, the Scots, US Navy, Why am I so fat?, Why am I so sensitive?
20 Comments
Fresno: Looking Past All The Suck
By Smaktakula Fresno, California is a powerfully forgettable city. Squatting like an infected zit in the center of California’s San Joaquin Valley (itself labelled a ‘New Appalachia’ by The Economist), Fresno is an embarrassing relation to California’s first-class cities: Los Angeles, San … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, Crime, Culture, Stupidity
Tagged Baseball, California, Central Valley, drugs, Enid, Fresno, If I forget thee T-Town, impoverished first-world hellhole, Los Angeles, methamphetamine, New Appalachia, Oklahoma, places that suck, San Diego, San Francisco, San Joaquin Valley, San Jose, Smaktakula's hatred of the San Francisco Giants, Tacoma, Washington, Why am I so stupid?
6 Comments
Gayness Audit Results In Downgrade For SF
By Smaktakula Who’s taken all the gay from the Bay? The question has haunted the fog-shrouded streets of San Francisco since last January’s gay audit, in which the flamboyant city suffered a humiliating downgrade. In a nationwide survey, gay-themed magazine, … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, News, Politics
Tagged California, childish sexual innuendo, even Jesus thinks Fred Phelps sucks, fisting, Frisco, fun with stereotypes, gay meccas, gay people, gay rankings, homosexuality, leather daddies, Minneapolis, Oakland, Pittsburgh, San Francisco, San Francisco Giants, Smaktakula's hatred of the San Francisco Giants, St. Louis, the Advocate, they love to hear it called Frisco
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Headlines 08.17.11
By Smaktakula User post: Am I just not meant to have friends? ~ Sorry, sad-sack–but yours is a destiny characterized by unremitting isolation. It probably feels better to know, huh? Can Twitter Save NASA? ~ Don’t be a child; of course it … Continue reading
Posted in Culture
Tagged abortion, Antichrist, binge drinking, Catholic Church, childish sexual innuendo, closeted celebrities, Delhi, Florida, gay people, Greece, headlines, India, Janet Reno, Justin Bieber, lesbians, Lesbos, Lottery tickets, marriage, Michelle Bachmann, NASA, Pope Benedict XVI, prostitution, Queen Latifah, San Francisco, smelly hair syndrome, the Greatest Generation, Tiny Tim, Twitter, ukeleles, Usher
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Nothing Good Comes From Touching Yourself
By Smaktakula Smaktakula’s long-ago Sunday school teacher was on to something–masturbation is a quick road to ruin. A San Francisco man is fighting for his life after discovering the heartbreaking realities of the devil’s handshake. The unidentified man apparently burst … Continue reading
Posted in News, Religion
Tagged pr0n, the Almighty, Emil Haagerdäddi, onanism, self-abuse, flogging the dolphin, God, 'self-abuse' isn't the same thing as 'cutting', jerking off, masturbation, choking the chicken, self-immolation, porn, San Francisco, scratching the weasel behind the ears, Onan, Genesis, Dixieland Jazz, Hurricane Katrina, devil's handshake, Sunday school
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Headlines 03.25.11
By Smaktakula and Various Editors In which we sound off on the headlines, without bothering to read the articles. Single, Female, Mormon, Alone~That could not be any sexier. Suspect Confesses to Murdering Pakistani Politician~When you’re interrogated by the Pakistani ISI, … Continue reading
