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Tag Archives: short people
Emmanuel Lewis: The Antigary
By Smaktakula Diminutive former child stars Emmanuel Lewis and Gary Coleman are often mentioned in the same sentence. At first glance, the similarities seem obvious: both were stunted African-American Eighties sitcom stars prized for their cuteness. And when their respective … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity
Tagged adorable, African-Americans, Antigary, baby bunnies, Brooke Shields, Clark Atlanta University, death by gun, death by hooker, Diff'rent Strokes, diminutive skonks, Emmanuel is the Antigary, Emmanuel Lewis, evil alternate universe, famous short people, former child stars, Gary Coleman, karate, King of Pop, Lolcats, man-whores, Michael Jackson, shitty TV shows, short people, skonks, small black actor, The Biggest 40 Inches in Hollywood, TV, Utah, Webster, Whatchootalkinboutwillis?
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Get To Know Promethean Times
Some things you should probably know before reading Promethean Times: * We take ourselves every bit as seriously as you do. If it’s not funny, that means you didn’t get it. Readers who miss the point are invited–encouraged even–to comment … Continue reading
Posted in News
Tagged Arturo the Pool Boy, Cameroon, discrimination, equal opportunity offender, integrity, Jack T. Chick, John Edwards, misanthropy, missing the point, Promethean Times, reacharound, self-promotion so shameless that it borders on hucksterism, short people, Smaktakula's distrust of short people, Tardsie The Backpack, Why am I so stupid?
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Frank McCourt: The Omegadouche
By Smaktakula Carpetbagging Bostonian Frank McCourt likes to live large. Despite his complete lack of merit or any trace of human decency, the most recent owner of the Los Angeles Dodgers has managed to achieve superlativeness in at least one … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, News, Sport
Tagged Baseball, Brooklyn Dodgers, Canadians don't play baseball, carpetbaggers, Delino DeShields, douchebaggery, Frank McCourt, Los Angeles Dodgers, MLB, Montreal Expos, Omegadouche, Pedro Martinez, short people, short people are plain evil!, Smaktakula's distrust of short people, worst trade ever
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Get To Know Frank McCourt
By Smaktakula To the myriad awful things you already knew about loathsome Dodgers owner Frank McCourt–the greed, the douchiness, the being short– let us add one more: Frank McCourt eats babies.
Malcolm In The Middle Of A Domestic Dispute
By Smaktakula Frankie Muniz, best known for playing the titular characters in Malcolm in the Middle and Agent Cody Banks, is many things: actor, race car driver, rocker. Sadly, it appears that “mentally stable person” is not among the Renaissance man’s retinue … Continue reading
Short People: At Last, A Reason To Live
By Smaktakula Let’s be perfectly clear: we have nothing against short people. Although we have in the past referred (and will no doubt continue to do so) to the vertically-challenged as runts, trolls, homunculi or other appellations highlighting their stunted … Continue reading
Posted in Science, Stupidity
Tagged 5'10" isn't tall, Abigail Folger, AK-47, Big & Tall, bigotry, Charles Manson, Emmanuel Lewis, hate anthem, hate speech, Homo Runticus, Homo Sapiens, homunculi, ironic nicknames, jockeys, Kentucky Derby, lawn jockeys, little people, Michael Jackson, Mini-Me, Napoleon Bonaparte, normals, Olympics, racism, Randy Newman, runts, short people, short people are plain evil!, shorty, shrimp, sizeism, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Smaktakula's distrust of short people, Spud Webb, Tom Cruise, trolls, tunnel rats, unfortunates, VC, Verne Troyer, vertically challenged, Viet Cong, Vietnam Conflict, wrath of God
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Cunning Runt Realizes Babysitter Fantasy
By Smaktakula People said Mark Anthony Richardson, Jr. was stupid. A loser. A Do-nothing. The authorities called him a firebug, and no less than his own mother claimed that her 21-year-old son “lives in a fantasy.” And yet somehow, this … Continue reading
Posted in News
Tagged adult diapers, arson, astronauts, autism, babysitting, botched similes, copping a feel, Craigslist, cunning runt, diapers, dumb kids and the dumb things they do to fuck up their lives, hobbits, homunculus, Icarus, loser, Marcus Antonius, Mark Anthony Richardson Jr., Mark Antony, million dollar secret, molested, Oklahoma, Oklahoma City, one's a cunning runt, pathetic, perfect scheme, pervert, pervertry, ribaldry, Rome, short people, short people are plain evil!, shrimpy weirdo, Smaktakula's distrust of short people, stupid people, that trick never works, What's the difference between herpes and a midget con-man?, wretched
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