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Tag Archives: that trick never works
Robertson To Marijuana Advocates: “Your Move, Dirtbags!”
By Smaktakula Only a few days ago, it would have been hard to blame filthy hippies for getting all giddy over the possible legalization of marijuana. Cannabis, the decriminalization of which had seemed until recently to be largely inevitable, may … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, News, Politics, Religion
Tagged cannabis, community college vs real college, dope, grass, hemp, hippies, Just Say No!, keep marijuana illegal, marijuana, marijuana legalization, Oaksterdam, Pat Robertson, Pat Robertson is batshit crazy, pot, reefer, seriously--hippies are odious, that trick never works, the sweet sweet cheeba, weed
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TripoliWatch 2011: Is This Show Still On?
By Smaktakula When oil-rich backwater Libya was caught up in the so-called ‘Arab Spring’ in late February, it seemed only a matter of time before unrepentant dickhead Muammar al-Gaddafi would be deposed and shortly thereafter executed, his leathery carcass cast … Continue reading
Hugh Hefner: Why Is Grandpa Crying?
By Smaktakula Cartoonish anachronism Hugh Hefner is no doubt devastated after being left at the altar. His former fiance, the twenty-five-year-old strumpet Crystal Harris, seems to have come to her senses at the last minute, announcing Tuesday that she would … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, Culture, News, Stupidity
Tagged creepy old perverts, Crystal Harris, D-Listers, Dracula, elder abuse, floozies, gold digger, Greta Van Susteren, Hugh Hefner, human souls, jilted, left at the alter, May-December romances, old people, Pandora's Box, Playboy, Playboy Mansion, porn empire, pornography, Ryan Reynolds, strumpets, that old person smell, that trick never works, the best laid plans of mice and men, Viagra
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This Day In History: June 18, 1815 CE
On which the French and English clash in Belgium, with Napoleon Bonaparte’s forces smashing into British lines at Hougoumont in what he hopes will prove the Duke of Wellington’s own personal Waterloo. *It should be noted that the historical community has … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, History
Tagged 1815, ABBA, Belgium, Corsica, Duke of Wellington, famous short people, Hougomont, June 18, Napoleon Bonaparte, scholars, shut-ins, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Surprise!, surrender-monkeys, talking the talk, that trick never works, the French, this day in history, walking the walk, Waterloo
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Irony, As Expressed Through The 2011 NBA Championship
By Tardsie It is almost-but-not-quite ironic that the term Schadenfreude is a German coinage.
Smaktakula Returns ‘For Love Of Promethean Times’
By Tardsie Smaktakula’s legion of slavishly devoted fans, groupies and stalkers will be delighted to know that Promethean Times’ head writer has reconsidered his decision to retire from journalism to pursue a life of boundless hedonism and degenerate self-gratification. Regarding … Continue reading
This Day In History April 25, 1915 CE
On which Allied forces begin the assault on the Gallipoli Peninsula which First Lord of the Admiralty, Winston Churchill, believes will knock Turkey from the war and lay bare the soft underbelly of the Central Powers. The campaign was such … Continue reading
Posted in History, Politics
Tagged 1915, Allies, ANZAC, Anzac Day, April 25th, Australia, Australian and New Zealand Army Corps, Central Powers, Dardanelles, First Lord of the Admiralty, First World War, Gallipoli, military disasters, Mustafa Kemal Ataturk, New Zealand, Pyrrhic victories, that trick never works, the Great War, this day in history, Triple Alliance, Triple Entente, Turkey, Winston Churchill, World War One, WWI
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One-Legged Hag Refuses To Let Senility Destroy Her Dreams Of Second-Time Motherhood
By Smaktakula Creepy gold-digger Frédèric Prinz von Anhalt announced recently that his wife, superannuated entertainment oddity Zsa Zsa Gabor, would like to have another child at 94. Anhalt has reportedly spent $100,000 for the procedure. Gabor, most famous for slapping … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, Cinema, News, Stupidity
Tagged adult adoption, California politics, creepy, famous for nothing, famous Hungarians, Frédèric Prinz von Anhalt, gold digger, hot long ago, in-vitro fertilization, Kaiser Wilhelm II, old people, perverted science, pregnancy, sperm donor, that trick never works, untalented stars, Zsa Zsa Gabor
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World’s Lamest Super-Weapon Unveiled
By Smaktakula There’s been much oohing and ahhing over recently-released footage of what purports to be a US Navy laser destroying–eventually–an unmanned boat. This technological innovation is welcome news for those individuals who have long sought a career in supervillainy, … Continue reading
Posted in News, Science
Tagged doomsday weapon, lasers, Roger Corman, Steven Spielberg, supervillainy, that trick never works, ultimate weapon, US Navy
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