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Tag Archives: Why am I so stupid?
Nobody Loves The Opossum
By Smaktakula Spare a moment of thought, if you will, for that most wretched and despised of God’s creations, the opossum. Sometimes called simply a ‘possum,’ this primitive marsupial is most famous for its disgusting prehensile tail and its trick … Continue reading
Posted in Science
Tagged despised things, Germany, has-beens, Heidi the Cross-Eyed Opossum, hideous creatures, Indiana, Kirstie Alley, mammals, marsupials, Mississippi, opossums, possum-killing, possums, robins, Shelley Long, starlings, the Germans, vermin, washed-up celebrities, Where Are They Now?, Why am I so stupid?
26 Comments
Tardsie’s True-Ass Tales: Would You Like (Penis) Fries With That?
By Tardsie As a lad, I used to hang out with a kid we’ll call Zed. Zed was a couple of years older than I was, but we’d met when we were both in the 8th grade. Zed was not … Continue reading
Headlines XV
By Smaktakula In which we get all the information we need from the headlines of the day: *** Anti-Putin protesters form a 10-mile human chain around Moscow ~ Anti-Putin protesters made into bizarre human chain in dungeons beneath Moscow. Poor reading … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, News, Stupidity
Tagged Africa, boobs, botulism, Brazil, breastuses, bumper sticker mentality, child abandonment, Chuck E. Cheese, death by soccer, drugs, Gollum, headlines, Iwo Jima, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Marines, Mexico, old people, political bumper stickers, prostitution, Rick Santorum, Seattle, Soccer, Vladimir Putin, Washington, Why am I so stupid?
15 Comments
Take That Frog Out Of Your Mouth!
By Smaktakula The American Language is an adaptive and remarkable tongue, borrowing unhesitatingly from other languages such as Latin, German and English. But this easy exchange of language is dependent at the very least upon non-hostility between America and the … Continue reading
Stupid People Too: Even More Stupider
By Smaktakula It’s no secret that the delightful antics of the very stupid are one of the reasons we get up in the morning. Morons make the world go ’round, and at the very least give us something entertaining to … Continue reading
Posted in Crime, Culture, Entertainment, News, Stupidity
Tagged Cincinnati, douchebaggery, frottage, Georgia, Jamie Hughes, Les Nessman, lizard men, LSD, lycergic acid diethylamide. LSD not LDS which is something very different, Michelle Allen, morons, Newt Gingrich, Nicholas Modrich, Ohio, Oscar, Piggyback Bandit, places that suck, Queen City, race riots, Ramtha, Sherwin Shayegan, Short Bus, Snellville, stupid people, Why am I so stupid?
13 Comments
It’s Okay Kansas, You Just Don’t Know No Better
By Smaktakula Rick Santorum has been declared the winner of the Kansas caucuses! Did you know that Langston Hughes, Dennis Hopper, Gwendolyn Brooks, Amelia Earhart and Dwight Eisenhower all hailed from Kansas? Not a one of them thought enough of the … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, News, Politics, Stupidity
Tagged Amelia Earhart, bad decisions, Dennis Hopper, don't vote stupid, Dwight Eisenhower, even Jesus thinks Fred Phelps sucks, foolish choices, Gwendolyn Brooks, Kansans, Kansas, Kansas City, Langston Hughes, Missouri, places that suck, Reverend Fred Phelps, Rick Santorum, Westboro Baptist Church, Why am I so stupid?
17 Comments
Santorum Trifecta!
By Smaktakula Rick Santorum turned a great many heads on Tuesday when he apparently swept the Republican primaries in Minnesota, Missouri and Colorado, proving once again that running right down the center of the USA is a big ol’ streak of stupid. You … Continue reading
Fresno: Looking Past All The Suck
By Smaktakula Fresno, California is a powerfully forgettable city. Squatting like an infected zit in the center of California’s San Joaquin Valley (itself labelled a ‘New Appalachia’ by The Economist), Fresno is an embarrassing relation to California’s first-class cities: Los Angeles, San … Continue reading
Posted in Celebrity, Crime, Culture, Stupidity
Tagged Baseball, California, Central Valley, drugs, Enid, Fresno, If I forget thee T-Town, impoverished first-world hellhole, Los Angeles, methamphetamine, New Appalachia, Oklahoma, places that suck, San Diego, San Francisco, San Joaquin Valley, San Jose, Smaktakula's hatred of the San Francisco Giants, Tacoma, Washington, Why am I so stupid?
6 Comments
A Gift For Your Stupid Or Friendless Child
By Smaktakula The Pet Rock, the novelty item which in the 1970s turned inventor/con-man Gary Dahl into an overnight millionaire, is back! This amazing product, which three decades ago took people a whopping six months to figure out was just … Continue reading
Posted in Culture, Entertainment, Stupidity
Tagged brilliant scams, foolish choices, friendless losers, Intifada, pet rock, ridiculous fads, Why am I so stupid?
3 Comments
