So when the Witnesses come a’knockin’–give ’em a break, why don’t you?
Originally posted 10.04.11
By Smaktakula
Admit it, you don’t know much about the Jehovah’s Witnesses other than that you fear them. For many, the sight of a well-dressed, smiling couple patrolling the neighborhood can instill the same fear that a gang member would. Unlike that gang member, whose interest in your house is only a possibility, the Witnesses are guaranteed to knock on your door, copy of The Watchtower in hand.
You may know some of the more peculiar details of the Witnesses’ faith–the failed doomsday predictions, their lack of cool holidays or Witnesses’ refusal to salute the flag. Moreover, they refuse blood transfusions and military service. Most peculiar of all, like Jews and Seventh Day Adventists, Witnesses choose to ruin their Saturday with church, rather than the accepted Western tradition of Church on Sunday.
But most people don’t know the price the Witnesses have paid over the years for…
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Promethean Times 
I have nothing against Jehovah’s Witnesses–I just rarely answer the door for anyone…
A sure-fire cure to discourage any religious tract people from coming to your door is to have one of those taped silhouettes – that are always found at crime scenes – in front of your door, and lots of religious pamphlets scattered around. That might be a George Carlin routine. It tickles me every time I think of it.