By Smaktakula

Nothing But A Euphemism For Touching Yourself.

The koan has been an essential part of the Buddhist arsenal for about fifteen centuries. These philosophical questions, the answers to which can only be reached by non-rational thinking–if at all, are designed not to test knowledge, but to put the listener  in the proper frame of mind to reach enlightenment. Among the better known koans are “What is the sound of one hand clapping?” and “What did your face look like before your father was born?”

It Sounds Like Your Lights Aren't Coming On.

In an effort to bring this philosophical discipline into the twenty-first century, Promethean Times has devised a koan which meets with Buddhism’s intellectual strictures, but is also throughly modern. Our question takes its subject matter not from the stuffy realms of philosophy or metaphysics, but from the full-color world of reality TV.

We Can Name Two Things That Make You Less Attractive.

Our koan is this: Between Amber Portwood and Leah Messer, two stars of MTV’s 16 and Pregnant, who is more representative of human dignity, propriety and decency?

The Real Puzzle Is That, To Get On '16 and Pregnant,' A Man Must Have Been Willing To Lie Down With You.