Canada, cock-knockers, Dalai Lama, DMV, Donald Trump, douchebaggery, Eddie Murphy, Emilio Estevez, Glenn Beck, Kobe Bryant, Lolcats, Mission Accomplished, Nancy Grace, Osama bin Laden, Prince Harry, Ringo Starr, Snarf, US Penis size as a cause of insecurity
The non-turbanned, loosely-wound portion of the world’s population was delighted to hear that inveterate nastyman Osama bin Laden was shot down like a dog, or like anything else that gets shot, really. For some this joy manifested itself in garish displays of celebration and of nationalistic revelry. For others, this was a time for the slow shaking of heads and smug reminders that, no matter the enormity of bin Laden’s crimes, death is not something to be celebrated. But yahoos and pussies alike found common ground in their delight over the death of the cave-dwelling cock-knocker.
But now, as the warm afterglow of Mission (Finally) Accomplished begins to fade, so also does the sense of cohesion which, for one shining moment of vengeance-fueled bloodlust, brought us all together. If this dispersion remains unchecked, we risk drifting back into our petty disagreements.
However, if a new enemy can quickly be found, one in which society can invest its currently unfocused capacity for hatred, we can perhaps recapture the magic of our unified malice.