Danny Wood, Donnie Wahlberg, former child stars, Generation MILF, hairless hit factory, Joey McIntyre, Jonathan Knight, Jordan Knight, Justin Bieber, New Kids Forever! Still Hangin' Tough Baby!, New Kids on the Block, NKOTB, nostalgia acts, stars of yesteryear, stupid shit little girls like, Where Are They Now?
Two decades ago America’s arenas were jammed with pubescent girls screaming for the manufactured teenybop that only New Kids on the Block could offer. The screaming has long since died away, and many of those young fans now have children of their own. And perhaps when her own daughter rhapsodically details the myriad virtues of the hairless hit factory Justin Bieber, now and then one of those former fans will spare a moment to think of those long-ago idols, wondering whatever became of those five boys from Boston.
After recasting themselves as NKOTB in 1993, the boys attempted a comeback. NKOTB’s song Keep on Smilin’ appeared on the soundtrack to the killer whale opus, Free Willy, which the boys hoped would revive their flagging fan base. Sadly, much like the film’s titular orca, it appeared the New Kids’ career was destined for the business end of a Japanese harpoon, ultimately to be devoured alongside some salaryman’s ramen.*
- The Other Three!
For those fans seeking the ultimate NKOTB experience, we recommend joining the lads on an intimate four-day Caribbean Cruise. This opportunity is a godsend for those women on the verge of middle age who always wanted to score with a New Kid, but thought the opportunity forever beyond their reach. Remember ladies, with their multi-platinum heyday two decades gone, they’re not nearly as picky these days.