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Daily Archives: May 21, 2010

Obama Dismisses Health Rumors As ‘Scaremongering’

21 Friday May 2010

Posted by Smaktakula in General Foolishness, Health, National Events, National Politics, People, Politics, Satire, Scandal

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Tags

Barack Obama, denial, scaremongering, stroke

By Smaktakula

In an effort to quell the persistent whisper campaign in Washington, President Obama was forced to address the charges head on.  According to the President:

“Contrary to rumors you may have heard, no one in my administration has recently suffered a stroke.  And no, there is no cover up.”

Obama blamed the rumors on Republicans, and expressed his hope that the matter might now be put to rest.

Sound As A Dollar

Courtesy Tips You Need To Hear Right Now: Driving Tip #2

21 Friday May 2010

Posted by Smaktakula in Culture, General Foolishness, Relationships

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Tags

courtesy tips, cretinous fuckery, dickheadedness, douchebaggery, Dress Barn, driving, holding up traffic, jackassery, lazy bastards, lot laggers, proper behavior, waiting for spot

By Smaktakula

Unless your doctor has given you one of these for your car . . .                    

      

. . .  Holding up traffic for no reason other than to ensure that Dress Barn remains within waddling distance makes you an asshole.              

Try parking in one of the dozens of empty spots by to Tire King.  Other drivers will appreciate your courtesy, regarding it as evidence you’ve renounced your former life of cretinous fuckery.             

Douche.                  

Die, Pustulant Lot Lagger, Die.

Also: Please review Tip #1.  You’re not doing it right.

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