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By Smaktakula

Japan can now include itself among the growing list of nations officially discriminating against skanks.  The Land of the Rising Sun has gone dark for strumpets: Paris Hilton is persona non grata in Japan.

In Much The Same Way As It Did Throughout Asia 75 Years Ago, This Symbol Strikes Fear In The Hearts Of Skanks Across The Globe.

Representatives of Japan’s immigration service claim that Hilton’s ban is a result of her recent guilty plea to cocaine possession in Las Vegas.  These officials are quick to point out that their decision to impose a Ja-Ban on Hilton was not only appropriate, but required by Japanese law.

However, pro-skank activists (skanktivists) contend that the law is a smokescreen which allows Japan legal sanction to carry out its anti-skank agenda.

“We’re trying to tell the world what’s going on in Japan,” says ‘Cody,’ a skonk who declined to give his real name, “The amount of ignorance on the part of the public is really disturbing.  We’re educating people, but at the same time putting pressure on Japan to not only turn away from its growing culture of skankism, but also calling on the Japanese Government to free Tibet.”

Paris, What The Hell Are You Doing? Oh. Ha Ha, No. When We Said 'Blow' We Meant Cocaine. Heh. But Thanks. No, Really--We're Good.

An immigration official was asked in light of Hilton’s Ja-Ban, whether her family’s hotel chain would also be forced out of the country.  The official replied:

“A question both so ridiculous and inane shames not only the speaker, but also those unfortunate enough to hear it.  Having said that, the Hilton Chain is a small, but important part of the Japanese economy–over three million people spend the night in Hilton Hotels every year.  Even in a good year Ms. Hilton might service only half that many.”

Paris, an innocent pawn in a game much bigger than herself, was typically upbeat when informed that she would not be allowed into Japan: “I’m going back home, and I look forward to coming back to Japan in the future,” she said.

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