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By Smaktakula

"Let Me Be Clear: I Know We Haven't Been As Successful As We Would Like In Our Ongoing Efforts To Demonstrate To The American People Just Why This Is So Very Important. It's Time To Stand Up For Future Generations Of Americans And Say, 'We Have Had Enough With The Violence! We Don't Want Our Children To Have To Suffer A Busted Lip In A Pickup Basketball Game Like We Did.' If We Work Together, And Refuse To Make Excuses, I Believe We Can Make This World A Reality. Having Said That, Mr. Decerega Knows That He Committed A Technical, And That I Should Have Been Allowed Two Tries From The Free Throw Line. That I Was Not Is Really, Really Weak."

By now you’ve heard how President Obama took an elbow in the mouth while playing a pickup basketball game, requiring twelve stitches.  Although the White House did not initially reveal the identity of Obama’s assailant, later reports named the unlucky roughhouser as Rey Decerega.

You’re not alone in asking, “Just who the hell is that?”  For those unfamiliar with Mr. Decerega, he will best be remembered for playing “Paul” on The Wonder Years.

This Dork Dreams Of Growing Up To Be Marilyn Manson And Then Someday Punching The President.