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By Smaktakula

Christians--Unless You're Willing To Blow Someone Up Over It, We're Afraid This Doesn't Qualify As Offensive.

The Smithsonian Institution has agreed to withdraw a controversial art piece which Christian groups have labelled offensive.  Some observers are shocked at the speed with which the Smithsonian gave in to the Christians’ demands, especially after it was revealed that the evangelical groups had not made any threats of violence.

“Obviously, the Smithsonian jumped the gun,” said Lydia Blatt, spokesperson for the atheist group GodBGone.  “The Christian groups who supposedly oppose this art installation can’t be bothered to so much as threaten to punch a guard in the nose.  Really, how offended can they be?”

Others deny that the material is at all offensive.  “I regret that some reports about the exhibit have created an impression that the video is intentionally sacrilegious,” said Martin Sullivan, director of the Smithsonian’s National Portrait Gallery, of the video which depicts a crucified Christ covered in ants.

We Had No Idea! Something Must Be Done--And Soon!--About That Offensive Sign.

We must agree with Sullivan when he says that “the artist’s intention was to depict the suffering of an AIDS victim.”  A reasonable person would really have to stretch to imagine that a depiction of the Holy of Holies bathed in carrion-eaters could somehow be offensive.  That the dread disease has become commonly associated with the Christian Savior covered with ants at the moment of His Passion should be common knowledge to just about everybody.

Lastly, Sullivan added, “Look, this is a simple issue of the First Amendment, and needs to be put into perspective.  I mean, it’s not like we threatened to burn a Koran or anything.”

In The Interest Of Fairness, We Have Reluctantly Included This Picture Of The Prophet Mohammed (Peace Be Upon Him).