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Tag Archives: Andy Bell

Overheard In The Bathroom At An Erasure Concert

03 Tuesday Sep 2013

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, Entertainment, Music, True-Ass Tales

≈ 37 Comments

Tags

acceptable racism, Andy Bell, crystal meth, drugs, Erasure, fun with stereotypes, ice, Margaret Cho, Me so funny!, methamphetamine, racism, Tardsie's True-Ass Tales, Vince Clarke, we love Erasure we just can't help it

By Tardsie

You Wouldn’t Normally Expect To See A Lot Of Gay People At An Erasure Show, But Life Is Stranger Than Fiction Sometimes.

Several years ago I was at an Erasure concert in Southern California. After the opening act, a painfully unfunny set by comedienne Margaret Cho which mainly consisted of mocking her immigrant mother’s English¹, I headed to the bathroom before Erasure took the stage.

“It Not Racism. It Edgy Comedy. Me So Funny!”

Unusual for a guy’s restroom, the toilets were abuzz with conversation. The topic was Margaret Cho.

“I didn’t think she was very funny,” somebody said.

“Give her a break,” somebody else said. “She was all right.”

Then one guy asked, “Didn’t she used to have a really big crystal meth problem?”

To which a disembodied voice replied from the depths of one of the stalls, “Oh, honey–didn’t we all?”

I’ve Been *Mostly* Successful In Avoiding These Activities.

¹Don’t get me wrong, folks–I enjoy making fun of non-English speaking people as much as the next guy–and probably a whole lot more–but there seemed no point to this, no examination of cultural differences, no clever interplay on Old-World vs. New-World customs, just “my mom is such a dumb foreigner.” ∞ T.

Falwell Was Right About The Teletubbies

05 Thursday May 2011

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, History, Stupidity

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Andy Bell, Dipsy, Dora the Explorer, Erasure, gay, homosexuality, insipid entertainment, kiddie shows, Laa-Laa, Liberace, Po, Rev. Jerry Falwell, Scooby Doo, stupidity, Teletubbies, television characters, the myriad facets of gayness, Tinky Winky

By Smaktakula

Jerry Has Moved On. He Now Wants To Know Why Dora The Explorer Doesn't Like Boys.

Years ago the Reverend Jerry Falwell became a laughingstock when he declared that children’s television characters, the Teletubbies, were gay.  Although the insipidly adorable British monstrosities, Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po have been turning children’s brains to mush for almost fifteen years, there is no evidence to suggest that exposure to the Teletubbies has any effect on a child’s future sexuality.

teletubbies names

Not Even Remotely Homosexual, But Still Gayer Than Liberace Draped In A Rainbow Flag And Eating An Ice Cream Cone While Riding A Sequin-Studded Unicorn.

Through the gulf of years, however, it becomes plain that the buffoonish Bible-thumper wasn’t altogether wrong.  At the heart of the issue is the word ‘gay’ with its myriad connotations.

Secretly Knows He Will Never Reach The Swishy Benchmark Set By Tinky Winky.

It is ludicrous to think that four sexless, half-witted mutant hamsters could be homosexual (or any kind of sexual).  Despite this, it is apparent to even the most casual observer that the Teletubbies are in fact massively gay.

Fred From Scooby Doo: Gay In EVERY Sense Of The Word.

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