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Tag Archives: kiddie shows

Falwell Was Right About The Teletubbies

05 Thursday May 2011

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, History, Stupidity

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Andy Bell, Dipsy, Dora the Explorer, Erasure, gay, homosexuality, insipid entertainment, kiddie shows, Laa-Laa, Liberace, Po, Rev. Jerry Falwell, Scooby Doo, stupidity, Teletubbies, television characters, the myriad facets of gayness, Tinky Winky

By Smaktakula

Jerry Has Moved On. He Now Wants To Know Why Dora The Explorer Doesn't Like Boys.

Years ago the Reverend Jerry Falwell became a laughingstock when he declared that children’s television characters, the Teletubbies, were gay.  Although the insipidly adorable British monstrosities, Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po have been turning children’s brains to mush for almost fifteen years, there is no evidence to suggest that exposure to the Teletubbies has any effect on a child’s future sexuality.

teletubbies names

Not Even Remotely Homosexual, But Still Gayer Than Liberace Draped In A Rainbow Flag And Eating An Ice Cream Cone While Riding A Sequin-Studded Unicorn.

Through the gulf of years, however, it becomes plain that the buffoonish Bible-thumper wasn’t altogether wrong.  At the heart of the issue is the word ‘gay’ with its myriad connotations.

Secretly Knows He Will Never Reach The Swishy Benchmark Set By Tinky Winky.

It is ludicrous to think that four sexless, half-witted mutant hamsters could be homosexual (or any kind of sexual).  Despite this, it is apparent to even the most casual observer that the Teletubbies are in fact massively gay.

Fred From Scooby Doo: Gay In EVERY Sense Of The Word.

Revealed: The Real Reason Sesame Street Pulled The Katy Perry Apperance

24 Friday Sep 2010

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Music, Stupidity

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

censorship, Children's Television Workshop, Elmo, Elmo is a mack, Elmo's World, episode pulled, I love to count!, Katy Perry, Katy Perry's tits, kiddie shows, lewdness, muppets, prudery, Public Television, scandal, Sesame Street, sex, skankery, skonks, YouTube

By Smaktakula

The children’s television show Sesame Street has been a hot topic since the show’s producers decided to pull a controversial segment featuring singer Katy Perry. Children’s Television Workshop defended the action, noting that its executive board had reconsidered the segment after receiving a volume of negative feedback.  Parents and youth advocacy groups are said to regard Perry’s plunging neckline as too racy for the children’s show.

The major media outlets all dutifully ran the story, relaying the information the show’s producers had fed them.  However, according to an insider who spoke to Promethean Times on the condition of anonymity, the story about Perry’s revealing outfit was “just so much fluff.”  The source claims that the segment was axed to protect the show’s wholesome reputation after news of an affair between Perry and a Sesame Street cast member became public.

Said the insider:

“Everybody knew what was going on. Ah-ah-ah.  We could hear her moaning in her dressing room all the way from the main stage.  Ah-ah-ah.  It was disgusting.  She moaned one time.  Ah-ah-ah.  She moaned two times.  Ah-ah-ah.  She moaned three times.  Ah-ah-ah.

Do you want me to keep going?  Because it goes on for a while, and if you have not heard, I love to count. Ah-ah-ah.”

"So Then Elmo Sees Katy For The First Time, And Elmo Says, 'Damn, Bitch! Elmo Hasn't Seen Your Fine Ass Around Here Before.' She Was All Like, 'Whatever,' But Elmo Was Like, 'Ho, Let Elmo Lay Some Truth On You: Elmo Is Gonna Tap That Ass Within The Hour. Straight Up.'"

‘Cause It’s Elmo’s World, Beyotch!

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