• Get To Know Promethean Times!
  • Magnificent Bastards
  • Douchebags Emeritus

Promethean Times

~ A Collection of Oddities Calculated to Amuse, Enlighten and Horrify.

Promethean Times

Tag Archives: New York City

Headlines: Shaking And Stirred

20 Monday Jan 2014

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Cinema, Crime, Culture, Headlines, News, Philosophy, Politics, Religion, Science, Sport

≈ 18 Comments

Tags

air travel, alcoholism, Alzheimer's, Arkansas, atomic bomb, Australia, ballet, celebrity deaths, conspiracy theories, Dick Cheney, don't hate us because we're ignorant, dope, drunken Irishmen, Erich Priebke, fear of flying, grass, hemp, Hinduism, homosexuality, Iran, Italy, James Bond, JFK, Julia Gillard, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, LBJ, male figure skaters, marijuana, Mexico, muslims, N-Word, Nazis, New York City, North Carolina, one Carolina is enough, Paul Walker, poor vocational choices, pot, reefer, Saltine crackers, sexism, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Social Security, stupid people, Suzanne Somers, SWAT, sweet sweet cheeba, the French, Time, untalented stars, Walmart, weed

By Smaktakula

We Believe It Is Vitally Important To Treat An Issue With The Same Respect You Would Accord To Any Other Issue.

In which we celebrate our awe-inspiring ignorance by commenting on the headlines to articles we can’t be bothered to read.

***

The Reasons Kim and Kanye Picked The Name “ North ” May Surprise You ~ So it isn’t because they’re both brain-dead half-wits? Because, yeah–anything else WOULD be a surprise.

America’s new Irish immigrants ~ Every bit as drunken and shiftless as the last batch.

Vote: Should Marijuana Users Be Arrested? ~ Hmm. You know, a better question might be, “Should you go fuck yourself?” You already know our answer.

Ark. SWAT officers kill man, 107, in standoff ~ Seems like maybe they could have waited around for just a little while and let nature do the messy work for them.

Seahorses stalk their prey by stealth ~ As opposed to the many, many animals which prefer to stalk their prey by making a god-awful racket.

Docs explain why James Bond prefers his martinis ‘shaken, not stirred’ ~ Because James Bond has a very serious drinking problem, and his friends are terrified to talk to him about it.

“Sorry, Chap–I Missed That Last Bit–Something About Drinking, I Think. And Did I Tell You About My License To Kill? Yeah, They Just Let Me Shoot Whomever I Please. It’s Great–I Don’t Even Have To Give A Reason. But Please–Do Go On.”

The Ridiculous Things Lost On NYC Trains ~ We don’t consider a 14-year-old’s virginity to be at all ridiculous.

Why We Cry on Planes ~ Because we–and here I mean me–are fucking terrified. Also uncomfortable. Seriously, can they design passenger class to accommodate the 5’8″-and-over crowd? And loosen up on the pot thing, of course.

Does doing yoga make you a Hindu? ~ We dunno. Does blowing shit up make you a Muslim?

Why A Peanut Butter Test For Alzheimer’s Might Be Too Simple ~ For the same reason that the Saltine Cracker AIDS test was a bust.

5 comments never to say to someone who’s grieving ~ “You poor dear! Look at the mess he left you; no matter how many times you scrub, you just can’t get gray matter out of chintz curtains–Lord knows how I’ve tried.”

Can TIME Predict Your Politics? ~ TIME is just People Magazine with a world leader on the cover. Grow up.

“But What Do The Kardashians Feel Is The Best Solution To Stem The Seemingly Intractable Internecine Bloodshed In South Sudan?”

Paul Walker’s Last Words Revealed ~ “YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

Would You Date a Much Younger Man? ~ How much younger? ‘Cause at a certain point, it starts to get a little…you know…illegal.

Atomic bomb nearly exploded over North Carolina in 1961, report says ~ Which would have been awful, sure–but we’d still have South Carolina. It’s not like we need ’em both, anyway; in a pinch, we could make do with just one Carolina.

Why I shun the Champs Elysees ~ Because it’s infested with Frenchmen. Duh.

The 4 Dangers Destroying Men ~ 1) Women, 2) Ladies, 3) Chicks, and in the case of gay men, 4) Gal Pals.

Restaurant Report: Chinese buffet facing violations ~ Well, if it met health and safety standards, it just wouldn’t be a Chinese buffet, now would it?

“Taste Just Like Chicken!”

5 simple things a tired mama wants for Christmas ~ Baby, I got everything you need right here in my pants–it’s a gift certificate for the day spa. You’re so special!

LBJ’s reaction to JFK’s death ~ “Hah! We got that son of a bitch!”

What Julia Gillard did for Australia and sexism ~ Although Ms. Gillard has suffered a setback, her greatest legacy may have been to pound the final nail in the coffin of sexism. As she walks off into the sunset, political observers everywhere will no doubt take a moment or two to appreciate her cute little backside.

Cheney Feared Terrorists Could Hack His Heart ~ Are you reading this, Hamid?

Suzanne Somers is having sex — and a lot of it ~ Titillating is to disgusting as 1981 is to 2014.

Figure skating champ Boitano says he’s gay ~ It’s hard to say how this stunning revelation will play out in the hyper-masculine world of men’s figure skating.

It May Not Be This Year, Or Even The Next, But Someday Men’s Figure Skating Will Have To Embrace Tolerance.

Whether you like it or not, the U.S. needs Mexico ~ It’s like the pretty girl who brings her ugly friend to parties.

Iran says all sides agree to N-deal ~ But still, no one can actually bring themselves to say the N-Word.

Erich Priebke, Nazi Who Carried Out Massacre of 335 Italians, Dies at 100 ~ Hopefully this will put it in perspective for you: God doesn’t care about Italians.

Am I Bankrupting Social Security by Taking Benefits I May Not Need? ~ Heavens, no! Cowardly politicians are bankrupting it by refusing to address it in any meaningful way.

Woman’s Husband Told Her She’s Not Pretty Enough ~ Still looking for the last honest man?

You Won’t Believe the Jobs Walmart Is Creating ~ Shitty ones.

Well, How Can You Be Trusted To Help Me When You Can’t Be Trusted To Make Sound Career Choices?

Headlines: We’re Not Laughing, Ricky

20 Wednesday Nov 2013

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Crime, Culture, Headlines, History, News, Philosophy, Politics, Religion, Stupidity

≈ 25 Comments

Tags

autism, Baby Hope, Barack Obama, batshit crazy, boobs, Chris Brown, conspiracy theories, crystal meth, don't hate us because we're ignorant, dope, drugs, Europe, ganja, global warming, God hates the left-handed, grass, headlines, hemp, Holocaust, Houston, JFK, Judaism, Latin America, left-handed people, legalize it, Love you Thorsie!, Martha Stewart, Michigan, MILFs, New York City, North Korea, obesity, places that suck, Poland, political assassination, pot, reefer, Smaktakula's hypocrisy can sometimes be astounding, special needs, spying scandal, sweet sweet cheeba, Tom Brady, twerking, weed, Wisconsin

By Smaktakula

No Matter How Loudly We Trumpet Our Innocence, The Man’s Always Trying To Bring Us Down.

In which we celebrate ignorance by responding to the headlines of news articles we have not bothered to read.

***

What We Lost When J.F.K. Died ~ Our reluctance to embrace wacky conspiracy theories.

Rain Forest Plants Race to Outrun Global Warming ~ But being rooted to the ground, they’re pretty much fucked.

Man says dollar store tricked his family into leaving Houston ~ Sounds like the Dollar Store did you a favor, pardner.

Tom Brady feels terrific ~ Does he ever! C’mon, try rubbing his backside!

Obese 2-year-old is youngest to have bariatric surgery ~ Is bariatric surgery that thing where they beat a person’s parents with lead pipes? If so, we definitely think he should have that done.

Still Think ‘Fat Shaming’ Is Wrong In Every Instance?

Will Legal Pot Cost More Than Black-Market Pot? ~ It already does, fucknugget.

Explaining Twerking to Your Parents ~ Why on earth would you want to do something like that?

Big penis, small penis ~ Lucky man, locker-room laughingstock.

1939 Jewish Husband Too Sensitive About Hitler ~ But the really shitty thing is that his wife STILL won’t admit he was right!

Martha Stewart Admits To Having A Threesome ~ We don’t know whether to feel aroused or repulsed! Repulsed…now kinda aroused…repulsed again…and a little more arousal…

No, Martha, That’s Not A “Good Thing” At All. It’s A Crime Against Nature!

Real estate company ranks ’10 best cities in Michigan’ ~ 7 of them are in Wisconsin.

Is Obama to blame for North Korea? ~ Well, the way Obama tells it, it’s George Bush’s fault.

‘I Don’t Want My Children to Go to College’ ~ It’s like I tell my boys–“the world needs ditch-diggers.”

Two-fifths of elderly spend more than they earn, study finds ~ Sure, but at some point that becomes prudent. You can’t take it with you, right?

40-year-old mom found nude in teenage boy’s closet ~ Assuming that it’s somebody else’s mom, we say, “Way to go, kid!”

So, No–This Is Not Cool.

Ricky Williams says weed was like his Popeye spinach ~ Sometimes people laugh at what they don’t understand.

What’s Really Going On When Men Call Women ‘Crazy’ ~ A potentially serious mental illness is being addressed to the good of all parties involved.

UPDATE: Pedestrian hit by vehicle was not using crosswalk ~ Serves that law-breaking fucker right, then.

Mysterious Sea Creature In Spain Washes Ashore, Baffles Locals ~ Turns out it was a bar of soap.

What to Say to Parents of Kids With Special Needs ~ “Oh, man! I’m so glad I’m not you!”

And Sometimes People Laugh At What They Do Understand.

Teen Accused of Stabbing Teacher to Death ‘Kept to Himself’ ~ Except for that one time when he stabbed the teacher to death.

Help! My Daughter Got Pregnant at a Friend’s Party and the Owners of the House Won’t Chip In ~ That makes as much sense as me suing the makers of the Dodge Dart for my children.

Why Are Some People Left-Handed? ~ Because God is cruel.

Obama to lay out agenda for economic recovery ~ You mean now? It’s not still 2009 is it?

What Happens When a Language Has No Numbers? ~ You call it ‘Polish.’

Based On Our One Brief Visit To Poland, We Assure You That Everything You’ve Heard About Those People Is True.

Sorry Europe, We’re Still Spying ~ And by ‘sorry,’ we mean ‘Fuck You.’

Chris Brown: I lost my virginity when I was 8 years old ~ That’s a funny way of saying ‘I was sexually assaulted when I was 8 years old.’

NYC police reportedly identify mother of 1991 murder victim ‘Baby Hope’ ~ They called her ‘Baby Hope’ because ‘Baby Irony’ was just too obvious.

Growing Number Of Latin Americans Turning to Judaism ~ Headline for 2025: Latin America Becomes World’s Most Prosperous Region.

Free mammogram clinic set for Oct. 19 in SLO ~ It’s in my garage! Why not have a couple of drinks before swinging by?

I’ve Had Shirts Made Up And Everything!

Headlines 12.10.12

10 Monday Dec 2012

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, Entertainment, Headlines, History, Science, Stupidity

≈ 24 Comments

Tags

Alabama, Albert Einstein, Alzheimer's, Baseball, Black Hawk Down, community college vs real college, Des Moines, great white shark, headlines, Hollywood, Hurricane Katrina, Hurricane Sandy, Jesus Juice, Nadya Suleman, New Orleans, New York City, Octomom, polio, pornography, Pussy Riot, redheads, Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French, Somalia, United Nations, Weekly World News

By Smaktakula

Once A Staple In Grocery Store Check-Out Aisles Across The Nation, The Weekly World News’ Folksy Exaggerations And Fanciful Tales Were No Match For The Real-Time Prevarications And High-Tech Lies Being Spread Around The Clock By The Likes Of FOX News And MSNBC.

In which we base our comments solely on the headlines. We leave the actual reading to society dames, old people and the friendless sissy boys who enjoy that kind of thing.

***

7 Reasons Your Neighbors Have More Money Than You ~ They’re simply better people and deserve to lead more pleasant and exciting lives. That’s why.

Octomom AVN Awards: Nadya Suleman ‘Blown Away’ By Porn Award Nomination ~ This is the first time we can recall feeling sorry for legitimate porn actors. It also marks the first time we’ve thought of them as in any way ‘legitimate.’

Post-Katrina funds run dry ~ First of all, ha ha–‘dry’–classy. Secondly, New Orleans has been crashing on the national couch for about seven years now; maybe it’s time it got up and went looking for a job. That carton of Newports didn’t buy itself, you know.

Tragedies can’t break heroic NY community’s spirit ~ After Hollywood, has there ever in the annals of recorded history been a city so embarrassingly self-aware and so achingly in need of constant acknowledgement than NYC?

Help! My Grandma Thinks I’m Not Her Son’s Biological Child ~ Look, you’ve got to understand that Grandma’s way of thinking stems from a bygone era. Back in her day a child could still expect a good public school education, so she’s pretty smart.

Saving Somalia: A wasted effort? ~Well, we feel bad saying it, but yeah, don’t you kinda think so?

They Made A Movie About The Last Time We Were There, Which Most Likely Means We Won.

Great White sharks are not dangerous according to daring photographer ~ Okay, be honest now: Who out there isn’t hoping this clown gets gobbled up in a spectacularly messy fashion?

The Island Where People Forget to Die ~ If that really worked, the world would be up to its ass in Alzheimer patients.

Ohio 16-year-old dead after fight with another girl over flatulence ~ FART FIGHT!

Community colleges’ promise meets bitter reality ~ Kids–for real promise, go to real college.

Edward Archbold Cockroach-eating contest winner dies moments after … ~ As if the lame-ass name weren’t bad enough, the ridiculous, undignified death is the icing on the cake. They’re gonna kick you around a bit in heaven, so be ready for that.

Polio: The UN’s Fierce Fight to End the Ancient Scourge ~ Rest easy, folks. With the UN on the case, we almost feel sorry for polio.

Solved Ages Ago. Seriously, When Was The Last Time You Heard Somebody Even MENTION Darfur?

In Des Moines, Turning Off Weather Beacon Unleashes Storm ~ It’s so cute–they really BELIEVE that!

Learning French Is Like Learning Baseball ~ Except that you get more stinky doing it.

Albert Einstein’s Brain May Provide Clues To His Genius, Study Says ~ Nothing better illustrates the contemporary need for an intellect like Einstein’s than the sad fact that scientists are seeking to determine if the brilliant physicist owed his world-class mind to the great big learnin’ muscle inside his skull.

When the Arab Jews Fled ~ Man, when DIDN’T they?

Traci Lords: I Want To Teach My Son To ‘Use His Penis For Good And Not Evil’ ~ The penis does not distinguish between arbitrary human concepts like ‘good’ and ‘evil.’ The penis is the lawgiver. Oh, and Traci’s a fucking halfwit.

Scientists: Genes, not sun, behind redheads’ increased melanoma risk ~ That and the Lord’s disfavor. Can’t forget about the Lord’s disfavor.

And They All Kinda Look Like That Creepy Homicidal Plaything, ‘Chucky The Killer Doll’ From Child’s Play.

The Absurd and Outrageous Trial of Pussy Riot ~ Well, it’s pretty much a given that any forum in which “Pussy” is uttered roughly 3,218 times will be a somewhat less-than-dignified affair.

Alabama man raped his niece while her father watched, police officer testifies ~ The detail which has so far proved most vexing to the investigators is that there appears to have been only one man at the scene of the crime.

In Haiti, Sandy Leaves Behind Death and Devastation ~ More death and devastation, that is. Let’s not pretend the place was Beverly Hills before that hurricane showed up.

A Surfer Waits for a Wave—in Idaho ~ Hope you brought a book, brah.

Give Pot a Chance ~ That’s all we’re saying.

For Asians, School Tests Are Vital Steppingstones ~ “But rest of you all dummies! And so lazy! You lazy dummies all work for me someday!”

Oh, Snap! By That Same Logic, I Guess I Don’t Really Drive An Automobile With Quite As Much Skill As I Think I Do.

How Old is your Dog in Human Years ~ Rusty’s four, moron. The tricky one is ‘dog years.’

10 things trick-or-treaters won’t say ~ “Why, sure!~–I’d be delighted to sip warm Jesus Juice in your basement while you give me a shoulder rub.”

The Elmo Scandal … Forget the Kids, Poor Us! ~ Is your life truly so bereft of real human experience that a scandal involving an imaginary character can so fundamentally undermine the foundation upon which your sense of self rests?

Cops: Bargain-hunter took home TV, left tot ~ That IS a bargain. Think of all the money he’s gonna save over the next sixteen years or so.

Help! My Husband Is Transitioning to a Woman ~ Why don’t YOU help, then? Presumably you’ve had some experience being a chick.

Size does matter in bed, study shows ~ So despite what she tells you, thumbdick, you leave her restless and achingly unfulfilled.

In Case Anyone Wants To Know (Ladies), We Wear A Size 14. Wide.

We Get It, Ladies: You’re Dying To Know, But Embarrassed To Ask–Size 14. Wide.

Thou Shalt Have No Other Dead Beatle Before Me

04 Wednesday Jan 2012

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, Entertainment, Music, Religion, Stupidity

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Beatles, Cee Lo Green, censorship, dogma, heresy, John Lennon, NBC, New Year's Eve, New York City, Religion, sacred texts, shut your mouth!, the Word of God, Yoko Ono

By Smaktakula

"Tell Me Who's That Writin' / John The Revelator / Tell Me Who's That Writin' / John The Revelator / Who's That Writin' / John The Revelator Wrote The Book Of The Seven Seals"

If he had to do it again, musician Cee Lo Green most likely wouldn’t have ushered in 2012 with a blasphemous appearance on national television.  He did, however, and just a few days later a reeling public is still hurt and confused.

It remains unclear just why the singer insulted the faith of millions with his callous comments, but unless he can somehow manage to right his rapidly sinking ship, Green’s actions may have seriously damaged his career.  With the exception of the lunatic fringe, the music-buying public tends to avoid those artists associated with hate.

"He Got Hair Down Below His Knees / Hold You In His Armchair / You Can Feel His Disease"

Here’s what happened:  Green was scheduled to perform John Lennon’s Imagine before an audience of millions on NBC’s New Year’s Eve broadcast from Times Square.  But Green, apparently ignorant of the sacrosanctity of Lennon’s lyrics, changed the words of this immortal song.  While Lennon originally sang “nothing to kill or die for/ and no religion too,” Green sang, “Nothing to kill or die for/ and all religion’s true.”

This is highly offensive to Lennon’s fans, who despise the dogma and rigidity of organized religion, and have loudly lambasted Green for his insensitivity.   Lennonists contend that the Word of John must remain inviolable if it is to act as a bulwark against the crippling conformity and monomania of organized religion.

"Well You Know / We All Want To Change Your Head / You Tell Me It's The Institution / Well You Know / You Better Free Your Mind Instead"

And in someone so wise and strong / a desire for Yoko is hard to see / there won’t come an answer / let it be. ∞ T.

What’s In Carol Brady’s Panties?

29 Wednesday Jun 2011

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, History, News, Politics

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

America's TV Mom, Brady Bunch, Carol Brady, childish sexual innuendo, crabs, crotch lobsters, embarrassing ailments, extramarital affairs, Florence Henderson, itching sensation, John Lindsay, New York City, parasitic creatures, politicians, pubic lice, skankery, TMI, Wesson, Wessonality!, Where Are They Now?

By Smaktakula

Funny, All We Taste Is Shellfish.

Septuagenarian actress and former MILF Florence Henderson is back in the news with revelations that might have best been kept to herself.  In her forthcoming memoir, Life is not a Stage, the actress best known for playing ‘Carol Brady’ on The Brady Bunch and as a Wesson spokeswoman revealed that she’d contracted crabs from a 1960’s one-night stand with then-NYC mayor, John Lindsay.

Lindsay Discovers To His Horror That The Little Critters Don't Confine Themselves To The Nether-Regions; They Get In Your Hair, Too.

Henderson waited to tell her story until after both Lindsay and his wife (to whom the politician was married at the time of the affair) were dead.  However, for good or ill, the public perception of Henderson has changed forever  From this point on it will be difficult to look at “America’s TV Mom” in quite the same way.  In fact, it may be impossible to think about her without feeling a disquieting itch just south of your belt buckle.

Here's The Story Of The Crab O'Grady, Who Was Hiding In Some Very Lovely Curls.

The Westboro Baptist Church Pretty Much Hates Everybody

28 Tuesday Jun 2011

Posted by Smaktakula in Celebrity, Culture, News, Religion, Stupidity

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

bigotry, childish sexual innuendo, Christianity, Claymation, crazy people, Davey & Goliath, death by automobile, death by drunk driving, douchebaggery, even Jesus thinks Fred Phelps sucks, Gay Pride Parade, God Hates Fags, homosexuality, IEDs, Kansas, New York, New York City, religious intolerance, Reverend Fred Phelps, Roger Ebert, Ryan Dunn, Shirley Phelps-Roper, Westboro Baptist Church, Wizard of Oz, yokels

Not Unlike The Protagonists From The Wizard Of Oz, Fred's Got No Heart, No Brains, No Courage, And He's A Little Bitch From Kansas.

In a maneuver of daring doucheness which surprised both their foes and their fringy clutch of boosters alike, yokel commandos from the Westboro Baptist Church staged a brazen assault on America’s East Coast.  The majority of their forces were directed at New York’s Gay Pride Parade, with some held in reserve in the event of a public memorial for Jackass Jackass Ryan Dunn.

Fred's Daughter, Shirley Phelps-Roper: You Can See The Crazy Oozing Out Of Her Like Stink From A Dog.

Westboro Baptist, the righteous army of the execrable douchelord Fred Phelps, has gained notoriety in recent years by picketing funerals, most notably those of fallen soldiers and marines.  These Kansan cock-knockers believe that America has strayed from the course intended by the Almighty by failing to lynch outright pernicious elements of society, most particularly homosexuals.  It remains unclear why the Lord of Lords has chosen as His sole prophet a deranged old nutbag from the prairie whose idea of saving souls is waving a placard thanking God for IEDs while screaming incoherently at grieving survivors.  Nevertheless, the indefatigable Clan Westboro is an increasing media presence.

What?!? The Space Shuttle? Why God, Why?

Westboro’s assault on New York City’s Gay Pride Parade is  in retaliation for New York State’s recent legalization of gay marriage, which according to one source close to Phelps has made the preacher “flaming mad, absolutely raging.”  Although the handful of church weirdos who showed up to protest the event were dwarfed in number by the gazillions who attended to celebrate, a spokesidiot for the WBC likened their situation to that of David and Goliath.  She then went on to explain twice that the story of David and Goliath has nothing at all to do with a TV show about a Claymation sissyboy and his talking dog.  She reconfirmed this information in a follow-up interview.

If God Really Hates This Dude, Why Did The Almighty Waste So Much Time On Meticulous Detail?

It is believed that several Westboro operatives remain on the East Coast, planning to disrupt the inevitable memorial to Dunn, which although as-yet-unannounced, most experts believe will have to occur soon before the reality-television clown fades from public’s goldfish-like memory.  Dunn died along with another person last week, in what in other circumstances would be called a murder-suicide, but because it was vehicular has been termed a ‘drunk driving accident.’

Granted, It Was Somewhat Irresponsible Of Dunn To Drive Drunk, Killing Himself And Another Person. But It Was REALLY Irresponsible For Roger Ebert To Suggest That Dunn Might Have Been Drunk Before The World Found Out That He Was.

Given the potential exposure of such a public event, which media outlets like MTV will be only too happy to hijack, the Church has an opportunity to bring their peculiar brand of Christianity to a wider audience.  However, the halfwits who grieve for Dunn aren’t likely to understand how the presumably heterosexual Jackass’ moronic and useless death has anything to do with God hating homosexuals.  The three or four whole-to-partially-witted folks who witness the event are likely to have the same problem.

We Remain Unconvinced That Talking About 'God's Rod' Is The Most Effective Way To Get Folks To Stop Thinking About Man-Sausage.

LIKE Promethean Times on Facebook!

LIKE Promethean Times on Facebook!

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

The Best Of Times

  • People Actually Believe That? Ramtha And The Lizard-Beasts Of Mt. Rainier
  • Hef's Former Skank Calls Him "Dead Fish"
  • Diff'rent Strokes Curse Remains With Work Undone
  • Belgians: The World's Most Evil People
  • It Was A Privilege Just To Have Known Her

Dumb Stuff We Say On Twitter:

  • Teachable Moments prometheantimes.com/2015/10/15/tea… http://t.co/QFzhCOBHaO 7 years ago
  • The Garden-Destroying Cross-Lot Food Fight prometheantimes.com/2015/10/01/the… http://t.co/lY6IVUWzYV 7 years ago
  • My Beef With That One Guy From ‘Fast Times At Ridgemont High’ prometheantimes.com/2015/09/23/my-… http://t.co/izgO4yJppn 7 years ago
  • Shelly The Parasitic Yoko of Pervert Alley prometheantimes.com/2015/08/17/she… http://t.co/0svsAHygLs 7 years ago
  • Welcome To Pervert Alley prometheantimes.com/2015/07/31/wel… http://t.co/tvFvovXjTX 7 years ago
Follow @prometheantimes

Recent Times

  • Teachable Moments
  • The Garden-Destroying Cross-Lot Food Fight
  • My Beef With That One Guy From ‘Fast Times At Ridgemont High’
  • Shelly The Parasitic Yoko of Pervert Alley
  • Welcome To Pervert Alley
  • A Profoundly Philosophical Question
  • My Friend Joey Park, Part III
  • My Friend Joey Park, Part II
  • My Friend Joey Park, Part I
  • Headlines: In Which No Puppies Were Harmed Or Abducted
  • Profiles in Loutishness
  • Bet Your Bottom Dollar That Tomorrow
  • Mea Culpa: 55 Cent
  • Goat Mayo
  • Headlines: More News We Don’t Understand
  • The Aging Gunslinger
  • Hungarian Fone Kard
  • Fresh Socks For Homeless Walter
  • I’m An Ass, And I’m Sorry
  • Headlines: I Was A Caveman’s Love-Puppet
  • Untruth & Consequences: Debriefing
  • To All The Girls I’ve Loved Before
  • My Missing Medal
  • Promethean Times Questions Existence Of Sri Lanka
  • Headlines: Shaking And Stirred

WORD.

Adolf Hitler Afghanistan Africa anti-semitism bad parents Barack Obama Baseball bigotry Bill Clinton California Canada cannabis Celebrity Death Watch childish sexual innuendo China cocaine comical despots dope douchebaggery drugs famous for nothing fat people foolish choices fun with stereotypes gay people Germany gold digger grass headlines helpful hints hemp homosexuality hypocrisy impoverished third-world hellhole Iran Islam jackassery Japan Kim Jong-il LiLo Lindsay Lohan Los Angeles Dodgers marijuana Mexico Muammar al-Gaddafi mullets muslims North Korea outright lies places that suck pot racism reefer religious intolerance skankery skanks Smaktakula's decades-old vendetta against the French Smaktakula's distrust of short people Smaktakula's hypocrisy can sometimes be astounding stupid people sweet sweet cheeba Tardsie's True-Ass Tales that trick never works the French this day in history treachery true meanings of holidays United Kingdom United States of America untalented stars weed Where Are They Now? Why am I so fat? Why am I so stupid? you got a real purty mouth

Promethean History

February 2023
M T W T F S S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728  
« Oct    

Search The Prometheosphere

Recent Comments

Vivek Golikeri on Alexandra Wallace: Ching-Chong…
Tim on People Actually Believe That?…
Anonymous on Commercials We Do Not Like: Me…
Dudley on Diff’rent Strokes Curse…
Anonymous on Commercials We Do Not Like: Me…
tomsimard on Sadly, Anne Heche Still L…
Smaktakula on Putting The Italian Army To Go…
David on Putting The Italian Army To Go…
Rackuzius on Brilliant, Dirty Weirdo Said T…
Smaktakula on Teachable Moments
Yoshihiko Motaro on Teachable Moments
Anonymous on Words Never To Use: N****…
Alex C on Putting The Italian Army To Go…
Usman Makhdoom on Alexandra Wallace: Ching-Chong…
Lary James on Untruth & Consequences: Do…

Tardsie D. Bagg

Smaktakula

Networked Blogs

NetworkedBlogs
Blog:
Promethean Times
Topics:
Satire, Irreverence, Snarkery
 
Follow my blog

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

  • Follow Following
    • Promethean Times
    • Join 459 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Promethean Times
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...